DEADPOOL!

Deadpool is a Marvel film that was released February this year (2016 for the readers in the future).

Deadpool (Wade Wilson (Ryan Reynolds)) is a mercenary that was created by the evil scientist Ajax (Ed Skrein) (Ajax is a fake name by the way, he isn’t really that cool). Wade went in for some treatment to cure his cancer which otherwise is be fatal as it wasn’t caught in time. Which leads me to the first quote of the film:

DrinkVanessa Carlysle: “You’re not going anywhere. Drink.”

Wade Wilson: “You’re right. Cancer is only in my liver, lungs, prostate, and brain. All the things I can live without.”

The treatment wasn’t exactly what Wade had in mind, he thought it was some legitimate treatment that could cure him, that was far from the truth. Ajax was trying to get humans to evolve so he could sell them off to the highest bidder, his method of forcing evolution was by causing grave stress upon Wade (and others) untill their mutant sells kicked in and saved them. The torture methods are including but not limited to drowning, electrocuting, being locked in an ice chest and the one that finally worked, being trapped in a chamber with next to no oxygen causing Wade to almost lose consciousness. deadpool-wade-wilson-going-into-surgery-1024x682

Wade Wilson: Hey, is Ajax your actual name? Because it sound suspiciously made up. What is it, really? Kevin? Bruce? Scott? Mitch? The Rickster?

[in British accent]

Wade Wilson: Is it Basil Fawlty?

Ajax: Oh, joke away. One thing that never survive this place is a sense of humor.

Wade Wilson: We’ll see about that.

Ajax: I suppose we will.

Ajax: [to Angel] He’s all yours.

[Ajax leaves]

Wade Wilson: Oh, come on. You’re gonna leave me all alone here with less-angry Rosie O’Donnell?

[Angel punches Wade]

While Wade is mutating and becoming the Uglyhealing hero he is soon to become he looses the Ryan Reynolds good looks and ends up looking like, and this is another quote, “You look like an avocado had sex with an older, more disgusting avocado.” that goes on into more descriptive terms but I’ll leave that up to you to find out what is said.

Later on we find out why/how he gets the name Deadpool and it is actually quite fitting and really matches with the scenario. Now it’s time for something that did bug me about the film. Everyone kept going on about how deformed he is, when in reality he isn’t deformed at all, he is just rather ugly. It’s nothing a good plastic surgeon couldn’t fix. Another issue in the film for me orientated around Wade’s girlfriend Vanessa. He left in the middle of the night to go get the treatment because she didn’t want him to go for some twisted reason, she wanted him to die in pain I guess. After the mutation took affect and we had beaten cancer he didn’t get back in touch with Vanessa, he was going to at one point but people looked at him and he didn’t want her to have to go through all that. *Note to Wade* If she really loved you, she wouldn’t give a damn how you looked nor would she care if people kept looking at the two of you. Suck it up and talk to her.

A new character was introduced to us in this film, Negasonic Teenage Warhead, you may know her if you read the comics. If we go back a few years, shave my head and make me a girl, this is definitely me. Well. Minus the mutant ability. She is a grumpy, sarcastic, leather wearing, people hating (for lack of a better word) badass. To show her awesomeness lets just read a few quotes…

Colossus: I’ve given Deadpool every chance to join us but he’d rather act like a child. A heavily armed child. When will he grow up and see benefits of becoming an X-Man?

Negasonic Teenage Warhead: Which benefits? The matching unitards? The house that blows up every few years?

Colossus: Please. House blowing up builds character.

Negasonic Teenage Warhead

Deadpool: [Commenting on her shaved head] Ripley, from Alien 3!

Negasonic Teenage Warhead: Fuck, you’re old.

Deadpool: [cackles] Fake laugh. Hiding real pain. Go get Silver Balls.

 

Deadpool: [to Angel Dust] You’re a lovely lady, but I’m saving myself for Francis. That’s why I brought him.

Colossus: I prefer not to hit a woman, so please…

[Colossus charges at Angel… who decks him and sends him flying]

Deadpool: I mean, that’s why I brought her?

[points at Negasonic Teenage Warhead, who is busy on her phone]

Deadpool: Oh, no, finish your tweet. It’s not… That’s… Just give us a second. Yeah. There you go. Hashtag it. Go get her, tiger.

[Negasonic Teenage Warhead attacks Angel Dust with a fiery explosion]

Deadpool: Oh, I so pity the dude who pressures her into prom sex.

Yes Deadpool has the better lines but it’s his film, he’s bound to. They where just so you could get an idea of the character that is NEGASONIC TEENAGE WARHEAD.

As it hasn’t been out a year. I won’t spoil any more.

If you have seen it let me know your favorite quote and or scene.

Thanks for reading 🙂

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s